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Why the US is in trouble…. April 15, 2006

Posted by scan man in humour, Politics.
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Its been a very busy week.

Wishing you all a happy and prosperous new year. (Tamil New Year starts on April 14)..

New Year Greetings

 

A doctor friend from the US sent this to me. I thought it deserved a wider audience..

………

These are precious. And any of us who have the new Medicare prescription drug plan realize it took real geniuses to release a plan affecting so many with so little thought behind it.

Why the US is in trouble!!

A Washington DC airport ticket agent offers some examples of why our country is in trouble!

  • I had a New York Senator ask for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.
  • I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information, then she interrupted me with, "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts," Without trying to make her look stupid, I calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa,". Her response – click.
  • A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that's not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me, I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state!"
  • I got a call from a lawmaker's wife who asked, "Is it possible to see England from Canada?" I said, "No". She said, "But they look so close on the map."
  • An aide for a cabinet member once called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive between gates to save time."
  • An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30 am and got to Chicago at 8:33 am. I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she couldn't understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went fast, and she bought that.
  • A New York lawmaker called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?" I said, "No, why do you ask?" She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said (FAT), and I'm overweight. I think that's very rude!" After putting her on hold, for a minute, while I looked into it (I was laughing) I came back, and explained the city code for Fresno, CA is (FAT), and the airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.
  • A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California, and then take the train to Hawaii?"
  • I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who asked, "How do I know which plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these planes have numbers on them."
  • A lady Senator called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola, Florida. Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?" I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola, Fl. on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever, Smarty!"
  • A senior Senator from Mass called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him that he needed a visa. "Oh, no I don't. I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those." I double checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express!"
  • A New Mexico Congresswoman called to make reservations, "I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York." I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, "Are you sure that's the name of the town?" "Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the lady. After some searching, I came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Rhino anywhere." The lady retorted, "Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!" So I scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?" The reply? "Whatever! I knew it was a big animal".

Now you know why the US Government is in the shape that it's in!

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Comments»

1. It's me, T.J. - April 15, 2006

Happy New Year to you!

How many New Year’s are there in the world?

Is it possible to celebrate New Year’s once a month?

I think that would be good. A new start every month.

Hey… cute post.

And I’m afraid that it is probably true.

later…

2. Moof - April 15, 2006

Dr. Scan Man … first of all: HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! :o)

Your new year is in the middle of your summer? Do you do anything special to celebrate the new year? What year is it in Indian time?

About the post, unfortunately, I believe every single one of those, although they seem so ridiculous as to be unlikely.

You know — that our elected officials are so numb is not as scary as the thought that, in most cases, they were elected by a majority … that’s scary … *sigh*

3. scan man - April 18, 2006

The Tamil calendar is based on the sidereal year (i.e. the time taken for one revolution of the Earth around the sun, or the mean time taken by the sun to return to the same position relative to the background of the fixed stars in the sky). The Tamil new year usually falls in mid-April and the calendar consists of twelve months. The first month in the Tamil calendar is 'Chiththirai'. Each year in the Tamil calendar has a name. These names follow a 60-year cycle. (The number 60 represents five Jovian periods i.e. it takes Jupiter about 12 years to orbit the sun). We have just entered the twentieth year of the current cycle. The year is called 'Viya'.
Moof, thanks for the questions. I looked this up here and here and learnt a lot.

4. Moof - April 18, 2006

Very interesting information, Scan Man! I copied those links, and hope to study them a bit! Thanks for going through all of that trouble! :o)

5. banta - July 2, 2006

this is mind-blowing. http://www.cocolalla.aidaho.com


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